As you might know… I kinda have a lot on my plate, emotionally and mentally. Sunday was kind of laid back…. saw the super bowl and it was ok… happy that the Colts won. As I returned back I wasn’t feeling so good.
I just shrugged it off because its me and I usually just push through the pain. It was just there until the hours of the night, until I felt so sick that I threw up all night. This not something I have a lot of experience seeing that I’m somewhat a heavy guy and pride myself in having a pretty “strong” stomach. I can basically eat almost anything and not have stomach ache or anything. So for me this is very unusual feeling. But I know it wasn’t the food because others from the super Bowl party would have had the same reaction. So I assuming that there is something up. Something much be bothering me enough that it is actually making me my physically sick. But after all throwing up all fluids in my stomach I gargled; that is a disgusting after taste, I don’t know how people with bulimia do it. and went to bed, with anticipating skipping my first class and chapel; Laura was going to sleeping in so I decide to also. But when I woke up all my roommates had left, I was in cold sweat punching the wall and shaking. I don’t know much about how the mind works but I’m fairly sure that there is some kind of anger/frustration issue amidst.
I know that i have violent tendencies and I have been somewhat good at controlling them but in my sleep. That just something completely different.
I just wish I can find what’s wrong with me before I hurt someone.