I find myself here writing because I cannot make myself got to bed and have a good night’s sleep. I really have no clue why. Could it because I was talking to the person I am pursing and have felt ashamed that on Friday night I went clubbing with people from school that she doesn’t know? Or is it that I haven’t doing my homework often and just getting by in my class for the last few weeks? Is it that I am pursuing someone back home and yet I am not sure that it the right thing because of the distance and the conflicting schedules of one another?
I don’t know the answers to any of these questions. Yet I have thought about them in some way or another today until now I have really thought them out and see that somethings are just there and happen. I didn’t plan to go the club but it happened. I didn’t do anything I am ashamed of at that club. I haven’t been doing homework as I should because I work better under pressure (if you really knew me you should of known that by now). And about the young lady that I am pursuing back home. Well the ball is still on her court. She has the last word on this. If she doesn’t want to be in a relationship she can just say that. But if she does we can make things work.
As for my opinion on all of this. I have none.. I believe that things happen for a reason and if this had to happen for me to realize that I care for this person so much, so be it. If this had to happen to see that she doesn’t want to be in a relationship with me, so be it.
Whom am I to decide what happens? No one. Things happen because God lets things happen. Do we know why? No because we are human and God is just that, God. He know best and sometimes we get mad at God or fight with Him and walk away, but the problem isn’t God, it’s us.
So I conclude with this, let it be God’s will. If it was meant to be it will be. If I was meant to be with this young lady, I will be with her. If I was meant to be a Music major I will be able to pass my classes (not saying that I’m not going to study and but some effort into my education) .
God is in control of everything and anything, He is our Celestial Father, and our friend. We can talk to him about everything.
May His will be done in my life that I have willingly gave it to Him for He knows what is best.