Random Thoughts

I Am Not One Person

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I am not a person but a collection of people. I don’t know about you, but I act and behave differently according to the situation and my environment. We are one person to our parents, we are another with our friends, different one with our significant other and distinct when at work or with complete strangers. But to clarify, being different people is not the same as having a different personas. At the core and center of all these different people is still you. Not a made up person just for the heck of it.

I personally believe that this ok. I enjoy being several people. I’ve had great practice in compartmentalizing all these aspects. While the last few years it has become less efficient, sometimes some emotions or frustrations bleed through when they should not.

I see this a good for me because I am able to ‘put things away’ when they are not needed and bring them out when they are needed. For example with my family I need to possess a certain decorum, when I’m with my friends not so much. When with my significant other I can be a bit more lovingly, but when hanging out with my co-workers I don’t have to be that way.

 

It also helps in other ways. It helps separate issues from situations. For example: I haven’t seen my father in over a year. I’m come to the conclusioin that he has divorced my mother and will probably never see him again. Due to his absence I have inhereted a few of his responsibilities. In his absent I need to do them and trust me I hate doing them but I have too. But you rarely hear me talk about them to any one. One of those reason is it’s no ones business, and another is that its a family matter.

Whole compartmentalizing is great and in theory should work all the time, but it doesn’t. Work bleeds in to personal and vice versa.

Sometimes we are burden, mad or sad and it’s not because of those we are with but beause of other things that happen to our other people,

I am not only Kenn R, musician/audio engineer, or Kenn R mid-20 year old, but Kenn R son, Kenn R friend, Kenn significant other, Kenn business man, Kenn manager, Kenn asshole, and so on.

We all are more than just one person but a collection of people. Some are just better at it.

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